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Almost all Asurs of note in Hindu mythology had their careers shaped in the same mould. They rise to power, they reach the top and then they go out with a bang. No quiet retirements for them. Here’s how it usually goes. Starting of course with Shukracharya, the Asurs’ Guru and the one sane voice in Asurlok (the Asur world).

Shukracharya notices a young Asur’s rise to power in Asurlok. He sees hope for the Asurs yet. He smiles his sage smile. The Asur fights like a rabid dog and soon his much injured opponents accept him as master and lord of their respective dominions (or are clobbered till they do). The Asur laughs. Shukracharya appears in the court. The Asur stops laughing and greets the Guru.

Shukracharya congratulates the king and praises him for his might and strength and courage. He then points him in the direction of greener pastures. Why stop at being the overlord of Asurlok, he says. Take Mrityulok (Earth), take Devlok (Heaven for dummies, although that is too loose a definition. This is not where you go when you die.).

The Asur likes the idea. He resumes laughing.

But first, says Shukracharya, you must get yourself a varadaan (boon). Those always come in handy when doing the world conquering thing. You must do severe tapasya to please one of the big three, Brahma, Vishnu or Shiva.

The Asur nods. He likes Shukracharya. If only the people at school had been this elaborate with their instructions.

So the willing king of Asurlok hands over administration of Asurlok to one of his younger brothers or a trusted general and goes finds himself a particularly uncomfortable spot (and a tricky pose to boot). He chants the name of his chosen deity for three thousand years standing on one foot. Eventually the force of his stubborn devotion starts rocking the royal throne of Devlok. The Devlok throne is particularly sensitive to devotion waves. Indra (ruler of the gods of Devlok), sissy that he is, runs to one of the big three and asks them to do something about his throne.

The big three, then have to address the apocalyptic Asur. So one of them (whoever it is the Asur is trying to summon, it’s usually Shiva) appears before the Asur and tells him he is pleased with his devotion. The Asur, bleary eyed and rather disoriented, manages to mumble something other than the chanting he has been doing for three thousand years. He says that he wants to rule all of creation and wants something from Shiva.

Shiva being the Santa Claus that he is, says, “Sure thing my good Asur. What do you want?”

The Asur asks for immortality. Shiva says it’s not possible. Anything but that. So the Asur racks his atrophied brain and comes up with a power that, if it were an MMORPG, even a level 80+ player would be envious of. Something on the lines of turning any creature to ashes with a touch. Or reduce an opponent’s strength by half with a look. Or immunity from the Brahmastra (Which again was a no no. No one has ever had immunity from the most powerful weapon in all of creation except of course, Hanuman).

In the end the Asur gets one cool boon and returns to his three thousand year old buddies in Asurlok.

(Time doesn’t work the same way in all three worlds. Asurs and Devas age slower than mortals. Even days, months and years pass slower.)

There is much celebration and laughter before Shukracharya breaks the commotion and sternly reminds the returned Asur king of his greater goal. So they attack Earth. All of Earth’s mighty empires are engeged in battle one after another. Some kings are sticky but eventually the Asur king prevails. Then they return to Asurlok and celebrate. Shukracharya reminds them of Devlok.

The gods’ armies are engaged and battles wrought with stunning special effects are fought.

The Asurs win. Devlok is taken. The Asur king, satisfied for once and sure that nothing more needs doing, resumes laughing.

Indra goes into hiding leaving his throne and his wives to the Asur king. He is bitter and therefore complains to the big three.

A note on the state of the big three here. Shiva is the destroyer of the universe. So he doesn’t have much to do… yet. He is content in his home on the Kailash with his family and animals. Brahma created the universe. He finds a I-don’t-know-what-you-are-talking-about expression quite useful. He knows of course. He’s not one of the big three for nothing. Vishnu is the sly one who runs the world. You could say, “It’s all his fault,” and you wouldn’t be far from right.

The three of them have a very chilled out attitude towards their job. They have internal jokes of a cosmic nature running between themselves, thus the constant smiles on their faces. It’s kind of rude if you ask me. Condescending… as if they are above the rest of us mere mortals. Sheesh!

But they do realise that Devlok can’t be allowed to be overrun (so to speak) by Asurs. Indra is the ruler of the gods by default. Even if he hardly ever does anything to deserve it, Devlok is his.

So they get back Devlok for him. And because they like to pretend that they don’t actually interfere in the workings of the world, they do it by playing games. Vishnu either takes on a babe’s form and lures the Asur king into doing something stupid that triggers his downfall.

The downfall isn’t really a downfall. More like spontaneous combustion (like what happened to Bhasmasur). Vishnu doesn’t shy away from truly heartless behaviour. That he does that under a mortal guise is no excuse at all. Did I mention he personally blinded one of Shukracharya’s eyes? We’ll talk about that later.

Thus the Asur meets his anti-climactic end. Asurlok is in chaos (the king’s reign was no better actually). A few centuries… until Shukracharya sees promise in a young ambitious Asur again.

Posted on Friday, May 19th, 2006 at 5:27 pm and filed under mythology.

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